Even after I moved away from home, I've still managed to go Trick Or Treating every year. I'm one of the oldest grand kids in my family, and I've eagerly volunteered to take the younger kids trick or treating every year. My aunts and uncles love it! They no longer have to trek around the neighborhood with their kids, getting exhausted while their kids run around hyped up on sugar. Instead, they can pawn their kids off on me for the night, and I'll bring them back with bags of candy, which I'll then take my "parent tax" from, before leaving to go back to my own house. I'm the best "big cousin" in the world! For those who haven't heard of the "parent tax", it's the candy you earned the right to confiscate from your children by taking them out to get candy for hours on end. Plus, I had the rule for my younger cousins that they had to walk, no running, they had to stay out of people's yards and on the walkways, AND they had to say Thank You at each house. If at any time the kids didn't follow all the rules, I got their candy from the house they "messed up" at. After the fist year, of taking my cousins out, I was getting less candy from them breaking the rules, but they learned that I was going to take my share of their loot via the parent tax, so they were happy to give me their bags so I could take my favorite candy, and then go away so they could devour the rest. I have to admit, I raised those little turkeys really well!
Now, as a parent myself, things aren't too different, except that my kids are autistic, and Halloween is pretty different than it was for me in the past. When Edward was younger, I would dress him up, and take him to as many Halloween events as I could. I was the mother who took her 3 month old baby Trick Or Treating. Although, I did have my younger cousins with me that year, too. I love candy, and any excuse to not have to pay for junk food myself, if a good enough excuse for me to go load up. I'm a kid at heart, and when it comes to Halloween, I refuse to grow up! But then things changed a couple years ago. When Edward was 2, he wasn't interested in wearing a costume. At the time, he was completely obsessed with the movie Frozen, and loved the character of Olaf, so I ordered him an Olaf costumer from Amazon. Edward refused to put the costume on, and screamed bloody murder when I tried to dress him. He's done the same thing ever since. Edward loves candy, and gets super excite to decorate the house, but he doesn't want to wear a costume. He'll cry and beg me to buy him a costume every year, and act super excited about Halloween, but then when it comes time to put the costume on, he refuses. This year, I tried for days to get Edward to wear his Mario costume. I had every intention of taking my kids to every Halloween event in town. Edward didn't want to go, and threw a fit every time I tried. I'm still pretty bummed about it, but every year I hope that maybe next year things will be different. Maybe next year, Edward will be more excited for Halloween, and then we can go to a ton of events. He's only 5, so maybe next year?
Serenity is completely different. Serenity has no cares in the world most of the time. She's happy to wear anything that you give her. She'll go through 5+ outfits a day if you'll let her, and it makes for a ton of laundry for me. Serenity was thrilled to put on her Minnie Mouse costume, and go get free candy. She couldn't wait to go Trick Or Treating! I just wish Edward could be as excited. Luckily for me, this year was much easier than last. Even though Edward refused to wear the Mario costume he insisted that I buy him, he argued with me a little bit, but then happily put on his Mario pajamas (which are actually completely identical to his costume), and was super ready to go Trick Or Treating, but got angry that we had to wait for Daddy to get home from work, and Daddy was running later than I had instructed him to.
Other than when Edward was 2, we've always gone Trick Or Treating as a family. We do everything as a family. For the last couple years, the kids have been reluctant to talk at the first few houses, and it's meant that Chris and I have to knock and say "Trick Or Treat" and "Thank you", but after the first few houses, the kids catch on, and are thrilled to do the talking themselves. Edward was diagnosed as Autistic, non verbal when he was first diagnosed. He would only talk to us, sporadically. But now that he's been getting speech therapy for the past couple years, it's rare for him to not be jabbering about something. He's extremely quiet around strangers, but once he gets to know you, he never shuts up. Serenity is different though. She was diagnosed as non verbal, and has yet to progress very much. She's two years younger than Edward, and was diagnosed at a much younger age, so we know that her leap of progress is coming, but it hasn't happened yet. She's speaking more now than she was a year ago at her diagnosis date, but it's definitely no where near as much as other kids her age. We only understand maybe 20% of what Serenity says, but that's ok, because she's still little and learning. Not everyone progresses at the same rate, and that's perfectly ok. Serenity will get there. Both Edward and Serenity are polar opposites of each other. They are both autistic, and while Edward is no longer non verbal, Serenity still technically fits the diagnosis. As I am typing this, Edward is standing next to me with his tablet, singing his ABCs. Serenity on the other hand, is walking around playing with her toys, and watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. Every few minutes, she'll go stand next to Edward and watch what he's doing, before going back to doing her own thing. Serenity knows the ABC song, but you can only understand parts of if while she sings. Just the other day, I pointed to a few letters on a sign at the park, asking her what the letters were, and she only knew a few. Edward can identify very letter, and has been able to do so since he was Serenity's age. He could also count to 20 before turning 2. We haven't done anything different with either kid, except for starting therapy at a younger age for Serenity. We watch a lot of Sesame Street (on youtube) and lots of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. Both shows teach basic learning concepts like shapes, numbers, counting, colors,letters, etc. I am not at all against allowing my kids to watch tv, but I do make sure that most of what they watch is at least semi-educational. Both Edward and Serenity have learned a lot about different things, just from watching tv. While I've tried to work with them on things myself, they're just not interested when it is Mommy trying to teach them. They would rather learn things from Mickey Mouse, so I've learned to be cool with it. Plus, there are some awesome learning videos on Youtube, so I'm happy to let my kids watch them.
Every kid on the Autism spectrum is different, and you can't expect that some thing that works well for one autistic child, will work for the next. My kids are polar opposites of each other. However, there are also kids that mine my two look completely "normal". One Autism family that I really admire and look up to, is Cooper's. Cooper is almost 8 years old, and completely 100% non verbal. Cooper is on the severe end of the Autism spectrum, while my kids are more toward the other end. While I've been struggling with my kids this week, wanting them to have the most amazing Halloween in the world, Cooper's family has been fighting an even tougher battle. Check out their story here.
https://www.findingcoopersvoice.com/2018/11/01/parents-whose-kids-wont-trick-treat-tonight/
No comments:
Post a Comment